"To be a great champion you must believe you are the best. If you?re not, pretend you are." --Muhammad Ali
"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be cumbered with your old nonsense."
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"I'ts not what happens to you that determines how far you will go in life ;it is how you handle what happens to you.
--Zig Ziglar
"Two men look out the same prison bars; one sees mud and the other stars."
--Frederick Langbridge
"Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for that determines our success or failure. The way you think about a fact may defeat you before you ever do anything about it. You are overcome by the fact because you think you are."
--Norman Vincent Peale
"A healthy attitude is contagious but don't wait to catch it from others. Be a carrier."
--Anonymous
"Attitudes are contagious. Are yours worth catching?"
--Anonymous
"Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it."
--Bill Cosby
"To Achieve Your Dreams Remember Your ABC's-
Avoid negative sources, people, places, things and habits. Believe in yourself. Consider things from every angle. Don't give up and don't give in. Enjoy life today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow may never come. Family and friends are hidden treasures, seek them and enjoy their riches. Give more than you planned to. Hang on to your dreams. Ignore those who try to discourage you. Just do it. Keep trying no matter how hard it seems, it will get easier. Love yourself first and most. Make it happen. Never lie, cheat or steal, always strike a fair deal. Open your eyes and see things as they really are. Practice makes perfect. Quitters never win and winners never quit. Read, study and learn about everything important in your life.Stop procrastinating. Take control of your own destiny. Understand yourself in order to better understand others. Visualize it. Want it more than anything. ?Excellerate? your efforts. You are unique of all God's creations, nothing can replace YOU. Zero in on your target and go for it!"
--Wanda Hope Carter
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
What up wit dat?
I am 42. I have enough wrinkles that I can no longer wear my one time favorite eye shadow...because it has too much frostiness (if that's a word). It shows too many of my wrinkles on my eye lids. I also have adult acne. What's up with that God? My Mom used to tell me to be happy I had such oily skin...it would make my face not wrinkle so much later on... That was true. I guess. I thought one day that I would no longer have acne. I guess I have to buy some Proactive and Oil of Olay! What up wit DAT????
Do you ever wonder what we do to ourselves to make us - what we think is presentable to the world around us?
My wonderful husband- Dan, says when I put on make-up, it's like I am painting a peacock! He is very sweet, but, I will continue to buffer the rest of the outside world from the ruddy zit fest which I look at every morning. Where did we ever get the idea that we should wear what we do? What is presentable? What do we want to present? I know by looking the way I do physically right now...that I am not putting my best look out there right now. I am aware of looks I get when I go out- that people are so judgemental.
My huny works in in the mental health field with clients that are either mentally and or physically challenged. He has such compassion for these people. I know that I have judged someone just on how they looked. I am trying to do better and know that no matter how someone looks...they are all God's children and they just need love and respect for who's they are....whether they know it or not.
We all need to have the same respect for ourselves...we are all perfect in His sight! We need to see ourselves the way God sees us.... we are His children. It is so hard not to judge ourselves by whatever guides us.... so keep something positive in front of your eyes...whether it is a quote or a scripture...or a slogan.... post it someplace you need to see it.
Some more goals:
1. Drink plenty of water. I started this when I started working in an office. Kinda hard in retail...with no bathroom breaks.
2. To be comfortable to fit and sit in a booth with my husband.
3. Walk every night.
4. Take one day a week completely off to have whatever you want for that day...just remember portion control.
5. Make a chart to see my progress.
6. Write down my measurements.
7. Put up quotes in my cube and on the bathroom mirror!
Do you ever wonder what we do to ourselves to make us - what we think is presentable to the world around us?
My wonderful husband- Dan, says when I put on make-up, it's like I am painting a peacock! He is very sweet, but, I will continue to buffer the rest of the outside world from the ruddy zit fest which I look at every morning. Where did we ever get the idea that we should wear what we do? What is presentable? What do we want to present? I know by looking the way I do physically right now...that I am not putting my best look out there right now. I am aware of looks I get when I go out- that people are so judgemental.
My huny works in in the mental health field with clients that are either mentally and or physically challenged. He has such compassion for these people. I know that I have judged someone just on how they looked. I am trying to do better and know that no matter how someone looks...they are all God's children and they just need love and respect for who's they are....whether they know it or not.
We all need to have the same respect for ourselves...we are all perfect in His sight! We need to see ourselves the way God sees us.... we are His children. It is so hard not to judge ourselves by whatever guides us.... so keep something positive in front of your eyes...whether it is a quote or a scripture...or a slogan.... post it someplace you need to see it.
Some more goals:
1. Drink plenty of water. I started this when I started working in an office. Kinda hard in retail...with no bathroom breaks.
2. To be comfortable to fit and sit in a booth with my husband.
3. Walk every night.
4. Take one day a week completely off to have whatever you want for that day...just remember portion control.
5. Make a chart to see my progress.
6. Write down my measurements.
7. Put up quotes in my cube and on the bathroom mirror!
Monday, August 30, 2010
Just Do It!!!!!
"Do not ask the Lord to guide your footsteps...if you are not willing to move your feet!"
I am willing... I just have to (like the old school Nike commercial says) JUST DO IT!!!!!
I have not been perfect this last week...although I was proud of making it through at the Old Time Buffet yesterday. I have been graced with a loss of 10+ lbs. Now, the challenge begins again...mentally, I just want to eat something fried. I have made a commitment to myself and God and you wonderful friends to continue forward! I know in time the fried stuff will not look so appealing and I will actually crave good stuff for me. God- hear my words...it's like a cocaine addict.... I know it's extremely bad for me...yet I crave it...I wake up in the middle of the night and would get dressed to get it. How wrong it that? I am sick! We all are that crave something enough that we wake up thinking about it. I want to allow myself that time to be creative....draw something... do not go to the fridge. I don't need it...I just want it.
Dan and I have committed to weigh on Monday mornings. That's when I will post to you all what I have lost so I am down to 369.4.... which I just got out the calculator and it's actually 11.4 lbs! Wow.
It is possible and we can- JUST DO IT!!!!!
I am willing... I just have to (like the old school Nike commercial says) JUST DO IT!!!!!
I have not been perfect this last week...although I was proud of making it through at the Old Time Buffet yesterday. I have been graced with a loss of 10+ lbs. Now, the challenge begins again...mentally, I just want to eat something fried. I have made a commitment to myself and God and you wonderful friends to continue forward! I know in time the fried stuff will not look so appealing and I will actually crave good stuff for me. God- hear my words...it's like a cocaine addict.... I know it's extremely bad for me...yet I crave it...I wake up in the middle of the night and would get dressed to get it. How wrong it that? I am sick! We all are that crave something enough that we wake up thinking about it. I want to allow myself that time to be creative....draw something... do not go to the fridge. I don't need it...I just want it.
Dan and I have committed to weigh on Monday mornings. That's when I will post to you all what I have lost so I am down to 369.4.... which I just got out the calculator and it's actually 11.4 lbs! Wow.
It is possible and we can- JUST DO IT!!!!!
Ok today was Face the scale day and.......
Well, I got up this morning and headed to the second bathroom.....the dreaded scale holding room! I marched right up on it and I had lost 10.4 lbs! Praise God! It was worth it this week....on to the second week...I know it will be tougher... but, I am looking forward to the challenge!
Friday, August 27, 2010
Followers Rock!
You Guys are the Bomb! Thank you for the help in getting me thru this first week. All your words of encouragement has gotten me this far and I an extremely GREATFUL for each of you!
I did not start this to be anything other than a place of accountability to myself and to God. I need to put things out of my head and down on paper(blog) in order to get them out. My wonderful, handsome, talented, smart husband Dan- is usually my sounding board.... as are you - my friends when I get to see you *wink*....
Please, keep reading and giving me any advice you may have.... even if it to say,"I hear ya...I am there too!" I love it!
I am with all of you- who struggle in someway everyday to make a change....
God-
Make this and other changes we try to make easy for us in our daily lives... let us know how blessed we are to have such abundance in America of food, friends and family. Let us not take it for granted and be grateful for all we have, need and do thru you and your might...not by our own strength, but, only by yours. You are great and mighty God- to do above and beyond all that we ask or even think. Make us healthy in our bodies, minds and souls. To follow you more closely and be a better witness of your Amazing Grace.
Thank you, also for getting me past Hardee's this morning without stopping for breakfast!
In Jesus Name- Amen!
I did not start this to be anything other than a place of accountability to myself and to God. I need to put things out of my head and down on paper(blog) in order to get them out. My wonderful, handsome, talented, smart husband Dan- is usually my sounding board.... as are you - my friends when I get to see you *wink*....
Please, keep reading and giving me any advice you may have.... even if it to say,"I hear ya...I am there too!" I love it!
I am with all of you- who struggle in someway everyday to make a change....
God-
Make this and other changes we try to make easy for us in our daily lives... let us know how blessed we are to have such abundance in America of food, friends and family. Let us not take it for granted and be grateful for all we have, need and do thru you and your might...not by our own strength, but, only by yours. You are great and mighty God- to do above and beyond all that we ask or even think. Make us healthy in our bodies, minds and souls. To follow you more closely and be a better witness of your Amazing Grace.
Thank you, also for getting me past Hardee's this morning without stopping for breakfast!
In Jesus Name- Amen!
Define Insanity!
Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome..... That's me....and what I do everyday! When it comes to my survival with food and my body anyway. I have always loved food and I am sure that it will not change. It is a part of who I am.....If you love someone you make good things for them to enjoy. Right? (That way I get to enjoy it too!) So, my focus needs to not be on FOOD- it needs to change to my ART...that way I can create things for the people I love, for them to enjoy and I will not feed them and me physically!
Change has to come- It takes me from the INSANE part of this weight that I carry around for all the world to see. A place that I display all the wrong I do to myself everyday. To a place where I can be free from fear and from this burden that I carry. Miki-Lite! I do not think I will ever be what others will call thin. But, just being able to shop at Old Navy would be fun!
Miki-Lite... I like that!
Change has to come- It takes me from the INSANE part of this weight that I carry around for all the world to see. A place that I display all the wrong I do to myself everyday. To a place where I can be free from fear and from this burden that I carry. Miki-Lite! I do not think I will ever be what others will call thin. But, just being able to shop at Old Navy would be fun!
Miki-Lite... I like that!
Bacon and Fried Chicken are Evil!
Just the smell of the kitchen makes you hungry.... I am always amazed at how our bodies work. Why when we think of the warmth of home do we always think of the best things Mom fixed for us.....
The smells and tastes and textures of home...I am craving a huge BLT on toast with a home grown tomato...RIGHT NOW!!!! The bacon would smell so gooood when you walked in the door and it was fried up perfectly so crisp and so delectable... YUM! Not to mention fried chicken....so tender inside...so wonderful crispy outside...fried to perfection. - Did you notice...fried, fried, fried.....Why do we love things that are bad for us? Maybe it's not that they are bad for us all the time...if we have them in moderation then we would be okay with what ever we wanted...right? But, for a drug, sex, or alcohol addict they have to walk away completely... cold turkey- no turning back. I can't do that with food. So, there are certain things that I can say I will stay away from completely for this time of change.
1. Soda
2. White bread
3. Refined Sugars
4. and this is a tough one.... bacon.
5. Fried anything.
It's a start... it is my commitment to myself to start with these and add onto this list.
Here are some to add to the list to get more of:
A favorite cotton quilt- that has been washed a hundred times and is so soft it feels like velvet on your skin...and of course smells Downy fresh!
Enjoy the way the cold floor feels on your tired feet after you take your shoes and socks off after a long day on your feet. Refreshing.
A hug from a parent... I think some people just know how to express love thru a hug....you feel it with your whole being. Love you- Mom and Dad!
The smells and tastes and textures of home...I am craving a huge BLT on toast with a home grown tomato...RIGHT NOW!!!! The bacon would smell so gooood when you walked in the door and it was fried up perfectly so crisp and so delectable... YUM! Not to mention fried chicken....so tender inside...so wonderful crispy outside...fried to perfection. - Did you notice...fried, fried, fried.....Why do we love things that are bad for us? Maybe it's not that they are bad for us all the time...if we have them in moderation then we would be okay with what ever we wanted...right? But, for a drug, sex, or alcohol addict they have to walk away completely... cold turkey- no turning back. I can't do that with food. So, there are certain things that I can say I will stay away from completely for this time of change.
1. Soda
2. White bread
3. Refined Sugars
4. and this is a tough one.... bacon.
5. Fried anything.
It's a start... it is my commitment to myself to start with these and add onto this list.
Here are some to add to the list to get more of:
A favorite cotton quilt- that has been washed a hundred times and is so soft it feels like velvet on your skin...and of course smells Downy fresh!
Enjoy the way the cold floor feels on your tired feet after you take your shoes and socks off after a long day on your feet. Refreshing.
A hug from a parent... I think some people just know how to express love thru a hug....you feel it with your whole being. Love you- Mom and Dad!
Facebook Wisdom?
I am constantly surprized at where we can find little gems or bits of wisdom these days... as I get older and things get more advanced with each day we are alive. We can find wisdom in the oddist of places. Here are just a few from this morning ...
I hope they don't mind that I copied them:
Matt Westermayer- "And you will never disown us for we know that you are for us. You never leave us for a moment, God."
Angie Todd- Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.
David Crank- It Is Only Until You Stop Listening To Yourself And Begin Talking To Yourself -That Change Will Take Place In Your Life.
Liz Curtis Higgs- So, so true: “Wise sayings often fall on barren ground; but a kind word is never thrown away.” Sir Arthur Helps
Sharon Folse Sellers- Attitude- chose a good one
These friends and others offer little gems into our days....if we choose to listen and get something from each one....We can make the changes that we need to find our path... Our true place that God has for us, for that day and everyday.
I hope they don't mind that I copied them:
Matt Westermayer- "And you will never disown us for we know that you are for us. You never leave us for a moment, God."
Angie Todd- Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.
David Crank- It Is Only Until You Stop Listening To Yourself And Begin Talking To Yourself -That Change Will Take Place In Your Life.
Liz Curtis Higgs- So, so true: “Wise sayings often fall on barren ground; but a kind word is never thrown away.” Sir Arthur Helps
Sharon Folse Sellers- Attitude- chose a good one
These friends and others offer little gems into our days....if we choose to listen and get something from each one....We can make the changes that we need to find our path... Our true place that God has for us, for that day and everyday.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
I am trying to be really healthy with this whole thing....
I am only going to face the scale once a week on Mondays. I think it's for the best and maybe that will make me think about things over the weekends. And, Dan and I have talked about a free day once a week.... First, this is not a diet. It IS a life change. I also know if we totally deprive ourselves of everything we love....we will crave it.
I have fasted certain things for a year. It was tuff! I know that if I don't allow myself certain things that they will take over my mind.
I have found out....that I can have chocolate in the house and not eat it all..... if it is dark chocolate! I don't love it and at the same time if I get small individually wrapped candies...I will only eat one and not ALL of them... it satisfies the craving and I still don't want it all....like I would if it were a Twix bar or Reese's peanut butter cups!
I say try it.... if it doesn't work...try, try again!
I have fasted certain things for a year. It was tuff! I know that if I don't allow myself certain things that they will take over my mind.
I have found out....that I can have chocolate in the house and not eat it all..... if it is dark chocolate! I don't love it and at the same time if I get small individually wrapped candies...I will only eat one and not ALL of them... it satisfies the craving and I still don't want it all....like I would if it were a Twix bar or Reese's peanut butter cups!
I say try it.... if it doesn't work...try, try again!
We all need to start someplace...even if it starts UPHILL!
I did it! I went and took a walk last night. It was only a quarter of a mile and I did take Smudge with me....he only has legs that are about 2 1/2 inches long (mini-wiennie) Soooo, he does like to stop alot....but we made it up the hill...I decided to take the shorter hill at the beginning of my walk.... but it is quite a slope. And at sometime in the near future I will take the "baddy hill" at the back of the complex first...I will conquer it! Someday I may even jog it...That would be amazing! With this body don't even want to think about a jog...what's that???? and why would anyone WANT to jog? Ever? God only gave us running muscles to get away from the things that might eat us...like; Lions and Tigers and Bears- Oh MY!!!!! I haven't seen any of those in my neighbourhood in quite some time!.... Tonight it's two times around.... Don't tell Dan! He thinks I am a wimp! *wink*
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
The truth will set you free....John 8:32
Why does the truth suck so bad sometimes....
Ok....I have done it.... Dan and I bought it....another level to my accountability started last night...the SCALE! I have not been on one in almost a year. I am afraid of what I'd have to face....a number. As long as you don't look at it it's not real...right???? As soon as you look at it....put it down on paper...It's real. All this scale can do is give me a starting place...a score, rate, callibration, a guide, a launching pad!
Then when we get home the question is.....what do you wear to weigh in? I say naked.... Dan says fully clothed.... I decide on a nightgown.
OK- it's time to face the music. I have been playing to the beat of my own drummer in my head too long! I have to look at what I have done. "FACE IT!", says Julian (of biggest loser fame) in my head. Face IT! I do....are you sure you are ready. Yep!
It's not as bad as I feared....but, still bigger than I have ever been. If it would have been more I would hae cried. I anticipated it and I am ready to never see this number again!
380.8 lbs.....the truth.
Ok....I have done it.... Dan and I bought it....another level to my accountability started last night...the SCALE! I have not been on one in almost a year. I am afraid of what I'd have to face....a number. As long as you don't look at it it's not real...right???? As soon as you look at it....put it down on paper...It's real. All this scale can do is give me a starting place...a score, rate, callibration, a guide, a launching pad!
Then when we get home the question is.....what do you wear to weigh in? I say naked.... Dan says fully clothed.... I decide on a nightgown.
OK- it's time to face the music. I have been playing to the beat of my own drummer in my head too long! I have to look at what I have done. "FACE IT!", says Julian (of biggest loser fame) in my head. Face IT! I do....are you sure you are ready. Yep!
It's not as bad as I feared....but, still bigger than I have ever been. If it would have been more I would hae cried. I anticipated it and I am ready to never see this number again!
380.8 lbs.....the truth.
Monday, August 23, 2010
God is amazing!
I know our bodies are designed to do amazing things...if we cut ourselves in a few days the wound is no longer visible except for a fine line of where the separation of skin once was. Is it not amazing what our bodies can go thru and still heal. God's creation....us. Wow, what wondrous work He does. I am and have been abusing that work. By not taking care of what He has given me to work with here on this earth that we call home. If I truly am the temple of the Holy Spirit, I have given a pretty lousy place to reside.
I have heard other people say that they have a skinny person trapped inside there body...screaming to get out. I have never felt that way. Maybe, because I have never been what you would call thin. I have always been a big person. Even as a teen-ager I was always the fat girl. funny...sweet.... fat girl. I relished the attention when I was younger, it was my way to be different and fun! Fat is different in many ways but it's not fun. When you start to age it makes you tired and weak. It makes things not work right in your body that was not designed to carry around this much weight....ever.
Tonight,
I go buy a new scale. As I said I am putting it all out there.... tonight weigh in.
I have heard other people say that they have a skinny person trapped inside there body...screaming to get out. I have never felt that way. Maybe, because I have never been what you would call thin. I have always been a big person. Even as a teen-ager I was always the fat girl. funny...sweet.... fat girl. I relished the attention when I was younger, it was my way to be different and fun! Fat is different in many ways but it's not fun. When you start to age it makes you tired and weak. It makes things not work right in your body that was not designed to carry around this much weight....ever.
Tonight,
I go buy a new scale. As I said I am putting it all out there.... tonight weigh in.
A day to begin....
A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step....or that's what I have been told and have been telling myself now for 40+ years. My name is Miki. I am an artist. I am fat. I am starting this blog as a way to journal...my process in getting healthy and to get there I have to put it out there for the world to see...not like they don't already know my secret....it's written all over me...and that you can't miss. I am a big girl that just keeps getting bigger and it's time to face the facts. I love food...they way it smells, feels, tastes...I love to cook it and look at it. I am addicted. There I said it, I have an addiction to food. It is my comfort. Not that I don't have other comforts also, but food is at the top of my list.
This whole cheesecake was sliced when myself and my husband Dan getting new phones.... He loves to take goofy pictures of me...and yesterday he took a short movie....I was a gast at what I saw....man it's bad. Why, When and how does it it get that bad, soooo bad? I just want to be a healthy person again...with a little energy and in sizes that I can go to even the big girl store and purchase off the rack. I knew when I couldn't go to Lane Bryant and buy clothes that things were getting bad. I am going to post pictures on this blog to let you all into my world if you dare.
This whole cheesecake was sliced when myself and my husband Dan getting new phones.... He loves to take goofy pictures of me...and yesterday he took a short movie....I was a gast at what I saw....man it's bad. Why, When and how does it it get that bad, soooo bad? I just want to be a healthy person again...with a little energy and in sizes that I can go to even the big girl store and purchase off the rack. I knew when I couldn't go to Lane Bryant and buy clothes that things were getting bad. I am going to post pictures on this blog to let you all into my world if you dare.
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